A Fond Reunion Due to an Unexpected Farewell

I went to a funeral last week, the funeral of my first 'official' boyfriend - Gary Anthony Stubbs. It was a beautiful and brief service, and I know he was there and happy that some of his closest buddies had shown up for him.

I had reconnected with him through facebook about a year ago, before that, it had been almost 20 years since I had last spoken with him. Finding him again was nice, and a little sad. I could tell he was troubled by something and that life had not been kind. I wanted to reach out, and we did chat some - but our different life choices put some distance between us. I am a married woman with multiple children, and he was a single dad who adored his little girl. I let him know through our chats that my friendship was always there, and that I would help him if he needed it. He was grateful for that, but kept his distance. I would see occasional posts from him here and there, and then....he just disappeared.

Gary had been crossing my mind a lot lately, and I knew something was going on with him, that's when I discovered his facebook account was no longer, so I had no way of checking up on him. Then, on June 26th, my phone rang and another blast from my past was on the other end. It was Steven Bradford, and I knew that anything he told me wasn't going to be happy...He shortly confirmed that feeling after apologizing for not contacting me before now. Gary had taken his life on Saturday, June 23rd and his funeral was tomorrow. What news! It was a shock to say the least, I was reeling just a little bit. Steve told me what he knew, and we did some catching up, he was definitely going to the funeral the next day, and I started getting busy making arrangements. After saying goodbye to Steve, my very first call was to my old friend Sandee (Beraz) Robison. She had JUST moved from Davis county to the city right next to mine. What a way to get together after 20+ years of not seeing someone, eh? Well, Sandee was as floored as I had been, and had definite plans of attending the service, and offered me a ride..I accepted without even hesitating. If I couldn't be there when he needed me in life, I was definitely NOT going to miss this chance to pay my respects and say my goodbyes!

I had a shift to work at the hospital that Tuesday night, so I went and worked. Then I went home and crashed for about 4 hours before suddenly waking up at noon and hurriedly getting myself ready before Sandee arrived. We drove up to Farmington where the service was to be held. It was a small, intimate gathering, and there was this wonderful peaceful spirit there. I knew my friend was there, as I have mentioned before...his presence was palpable. I could feel his excitement over the fact that his closest high school friends had come to wish him a fond farewell, and that there were others who couldn't make it who were there in spirit as well. I knew that where ever he was, he was happy, and at peace - something that had always been a struggle for him in this life.

I shed quite a few tears during his service, a select few members got up and shared experiences that they had had with Gary, they were wonderful. It brought me comfort that he was surrounded with such love.

So, what ever you are up to now Gary...I wish you the best, and I hope to see you again someday, my good friend...you will be missed!